The holiday season is already here. It is the time most people spend the entire year looking forward to. It is easy to understand why it is one of the best periods of the year – people finally can switch their focus from work and other stressful activities to more relaxing activities like sharing stories with loved ones. Sadly, this same period that a lot of people consider relaxing is more stressful for far too many people; for example, those who find themselves very far from their families, those who are reminded of the loss of loved ones or those who are single.

When you are in a relationship, it can be easy to overlook the fact that a good number of holiday activities are tied to having a romantic partner to share them with. And when you are single, all those romantic venues are like giant signs along the roadways you travel telling you that “you are alone”. As if that wasn’t enough, those same streets are always filled with couples walking arm-in-arm, and the increasingly cold weather keeps reminding you about the necessity to have someone to cuddle at night.

Not to worry though! There is good news for all the single people out there. Here’s the silver lining – being single during the holiday season can be a real gift. Here are a few tips:

  1. Take a Social media break

Social media definitely have their benefits. They help us stay in touch with friends and family members we have not seen in years and who live far away. It has also become a popular place for sharing stories. Unfortunately, social media also come with a number of downsides, one of which is the effects of comparison.

Most social media users only upload images or videos portraying their best moments. The pictures are carefully chosen and passed through some of the best editing software and filters. The issue is that we sometimes believe everything we see on social media is real and authentic. We believe all our friends and family members are having the time of their lives, whereas you are just single and alone. This can hurt you more than it helps you if you are struggling with loneliness. Taking a break might sound difficult for some and even impossible for others but it is worth the effort. You alone can define the terms of your break; it could be a few months, weeks or just not checking your phone every 15 minutes.

  1. Invest in other relationships

Being single might make you feel like you are alone, but you are not! Most likely you have some great friends and family members who would love to spend time with you. Taking a social media break and being single during the holiday season mean you will have a lot of free time you can invest in those relationships (the time you might not have had if you were dating). You are free to visit whomever you want, whenever you want to. This will even give you the opportunity to meet new friends. What are you waiting for? Pick up your phone and ask one of your friends to meet you for lunch – you probably have a lot to talk about.

  1. Travel

Have you ever thought about taking a holiday during the holidays? Though the holiday season is “commonly” known as the time most people spend with family, it does not always have to be that way. Especially if spending the holidays with your grandparents mean that grandma will spend the entire time asking you why you are not in a relationship; or sharing stories about her courtship and 40-year marriage with grandpa. Go pack your bags and enjoy a completely new experience. There are so many benefits to travelling. Bon voyage!

Being single should not stop you from feeling connected and enjoying the holiday season. You can use this as an opportunity to discover yourself and do things you would not be able to do if you were in a relationship. Happy Holidays!

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24 Comments

Adaego M. Azi · December 29, 2019 at 1:14 am

Another article that I know a lot about. I am very close to my parents, so I spend almost every Christmas with them. So even when I am surrounded with family, if I don’t have a boyfriend, Christmas can feel very lonely. Here is what is even worse – my friends and I always go to a New Year’s Eve party and when it’s time to kiss “someone special” at the stroke of midnight, without a boyfriend I always feel like such a loser. This year I have a boyfriend. He spent Christmas Eve (a big day of celebration for us in Nigeria) and Christmas with my family and I was all smiles! 😊 I know that I don’t need to have a boyfriend to be happy, it’s just nice not to be alone. Thanks duppydomTEAM.

    duppydomTEAM · December 29, 2019 at 7:20 pm

    Thank you Adaego – we fully understand. During the Holiday Season, it’s not about needing someone special in your life, it’s about wanting someone special in your life. The Holidays is about faith, family, togetherness, brotherhood and sisterhood, and many people often yearn to have someone special to share it with. Glad to hear that you are enjoying the Season this year 🎅. Happy 2020! 🎈🎈

      Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:24 am

      Thank you duppydomTEAM 🤗

    Nadine Wu · December 30, 2019 at 2:03 am

    Happy Holidays Adaego.

    S. Jakes · December 30, 2019 at 4:04 am

    Thanks Adaego 🤗

Lisa Steffler · December 29, 2019 at 3:46 am

duppydomTEAM, thank you for opening my eyes. I am always around family during the holiday season and I have had a boyfriend or married for so long, but because I do a lot of work with my church, I know that a lot of people (with and without family) feel alone. The article got me thinking, so I did some quick research on the internet and was very surprised at how many articles spoke about this. Here is an article that I found particularly interesting:
https://www.aarp.org/research/topics/life/info-2017/holiday-season.html
1,005 adults over the age of 18 were surveyed just before Christmas, and in terms of loneliness, here is what was found: “Thirty-one percent of respondents say they have felt lonely during the holiday season sometime during the past five years, and 41 percent have worried about a family member or friend feeling lonesome.” It is heartbreaking to know that there is so much unhappiness during this time of year, but I am happy to know that we are doing our part to help.

    duppydomTEAM · December 29, 2019 at 7:19 pm

    Lisa, thank you for forwarding the article – that was very nice of you. We also found the article to be informative (The Holiday Season: Joy, Love & Loneliness) – so much so, that we have incorporated it as a weblink in our blog article. You are correct Lisa, we often forget how lucky we are and don’t think about how many are less fortunate, lonely, and isolated during the Holiday Season. It’s nice to know that so many charitable organizations and individuals like you are giving a helping hand ⛪❤. Happy 2020! 🎈🎈

      Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:27 am

      🤗

    S. Jakes · December 30, 2019 at 4:08 am

    Happy Holidays Lisa 😁

    Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:26 am

    👍

Bruce Peters · December 29, 2019 at 6:54 am

duppydomTEAM – over the holiday season, I always spend some time with my ex-wife and our boy. But I am a bachelor and proud of it. Whether I am in a relationship or not, there is no reason to feel isolated, alone, or anything else negative over Christmas. There is so much to do during the holidays. And yes, taking a holiday during the holidays is awesome – and as long as you are not flying just before or on Christmas day, there are so many vacation deals. If you are suffering from the holiday blues and you are looking for cheap and warm/hot places to go, I highly recommend: Cancún, Mexico; Ocho Rios, Jamaica; Roatán Island, Honduras; Tenerife, Canary Islands, Spain; and Caye Caulker, Belize.

    duppydomTEAM · December 29, 2019 at 7:17 pm

    Bruce, thank you for your comments. You are not alone; a lot of people take a mini vacation during the holidays – this is a great way to boost the spirit. And thank you for the places you have recommended – I am going to assume these are places you have visited and have firsthand knowledge about ✈✈. Happy 2020! 🎈🎈

    S. Jakes · December 30, 2019 at 4:06 am

    Thanks Bruce. Happy Holidays 👍

D'Gauntlett · December 29, 2019 at 7:55 pm

As someone who is widowed and volunteers in different areas of my community I know and understands the ups and downs of being alone and the fear some people feel during the holiday season. For able bodied individuals like myself who loves traveling, no worries. This past Christmas I reconfirmed how sad being alone for some can be. Someone I know with many different health issues was diagnosed with something new. A procedure had to be done. Not only was the patient prohibited by law from driving that day she could have had a stroke, a heart attack or even die right there on the table.
So there I was, 5 days away from catching a plane back, she called, “is it possible to change your flight and help me out”? Honestly, I hesitated, I’ve been away 6 weeks already. But why not?, You’re single, the little voice said. So I agreed.
Christmas Day arrived, we had breakfast and for the remainder of the day we laid about chit-chatting about life and keeping each other’s company. God knows I didn’t miss all the fuss that comes with the holidays. Her sincere gratitude was enough to warm my heart. Most of all I am glad I decided to invest an extra 10 days in our friendship. We go again for a check-up on the 31st, then I’ll be off. My thoughts will be with her and many more like her who are alone and isolated. As for social media, we need a reality check if we really believe the people that give likes and comments are our true source of friendships. We need people as much as they need us.

Thanks duppydom team. A healthy and prosperous 2020 to all of you.

    duppydomTEAM · December 30, 2019 at 9:31 pm

    D’Gauntlett – thank you for sharing your experiences with us. I think your comments are good reminders to us all. We regularly forget (or don’t think about) the fact that so many people are in so many situations, that can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness during the Holiday Season; and more often than not, these individuals are far worse off than we are. Additionally, we frequently forget that the greatest gift we can give during the Holidays is love – whether to family, friend, or stranger. And the greatest gift we can get is love – whether from family, friend, or stranger. You are a good friend D’Gauntlett, and I am sure your friend welcomed your gifts of love, warmth and support. I only hope that there are people in your life who are giving you the same gifts 🎁🎁. And likewise, Happy 2020! 🎈🎈

      Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:29 am

      🤗

    Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:29 am

    God bless you DGauntlett 🙏

Nadine Wu · December 30, 2019 at 2:05 am

I am now living on my own for the first time. Once you start living on your own, the Christmas holidays is never the same. My parents live in the same city, so I see them at Christmas. I am usually there for 1-2 days, and of course I see my parents and any other relatives visiting my parents, then I am back to my empty apartment until I start work in January. This is the time over the holiday season that can be very lonely and depressing. Even if I see my friends, I still go back to an empty apartment. If I was in a relationship, at least we could hang out and he would sleep over all the time. I am not complaining – this is just the way things are right now.

    duppydomTEAM · December 30, 2019 at 8:32 pm

    Nadine – we appreciate your comments. When we move away from home, it always takes an adjustment period to get used to living on our own. And one of the things we learn is that there is a big difference between being/living alone and being lonely. Aside from not being in a relationship, perhaps a part of your loneliness stems from living on your own for the first time. You can take solace in knowing that “this is just the way things are right now”. Life circumstances are constantly changing and perhaps in the next few months you will be looking at life through a different colored lens. Happy 2020! 🎈🎈

    Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:31 am

    🌞

S. Jakes · December 30, 2019 at 3:59 am

I have to agree with Adaego. Over the Christmas holidays I see my family and friends, but it’s not the same when I am single. I wouldn’t say that I feel isolated, but I definitely feel alone—particularly after Christmas when I go back to my apartment. When I am not in a relationship, the part of the Holiday Season that depresses me the most is not shopping for a boyfriend – I find it very romantic thinking about him and shopping for the perfect gift… I also find it astounding how many people feel lonely during the Holidays. Thank you duppydom 👏

    duppydomTEAM · December 30, 2019 at 8:34 pm

    S. Jakes – thank you for sharing. You are right on point – a lot of people enjoy shopping for their “special someone” during the Holidays and are saddened when they are not in a relationship. An excellent way to lift your spirits, is to go on a shopping spree for the other “special someone” in your life – you! Or, another way to heighten your spirits even more is to “invest in other relationships”. This could mean investing time or money at a homeless shelter in your community 🎁 – helping those who are perhaps also feeling isolated and lonely during the Holidays. Happy 2020! 🎈🎈

      Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:35 am

      👏👏

    Adaego M. Azi · December 31, 2019 at 8:33 am

    Thanks SJakes 🌞🤗

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