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Amelia Roosevelt


That Is Not My Best

Posted On:03-Jan-2021/6:08 am

“Yeah! Now he is working at an airline group. An executive there, he gets a good salary, will get married this year.” 

“So, how is your son? Haven’t seen for a long time. Not a brilliant like daughter, isn’t he?”

She was non-stop. My good friend. My Brutus. Better if she stabbed me with a dagger. It will come out with lesser pain.

Her daughter was my daughter's classmate. When they were studying for University entrance, my son was studying at home, for his third attempt for the same exam. He had major surgery to remove his colon, missed one full year in his life for the catastrophe. He was suffering from serious pain in his abdomen, severe bleeding in his intestine, not knowing he was reaching a life-threatening stage of ulcerative colitis. He was taking his medicines, claiming he was okay.

For some time, everything was calm. He entered the university he liked, had to eat whatever available. Again he was sick. He missed a full term for medication.

We were happy at least he was not suffering.

Then there was a wedding of one of his classmates. He was ready and asked his father to drop him there. I was so happy since he was able to attend some party. He could stay out with his friends.

But before long, they were back. Hid diarrhoea was back again. You could imagine my heartbreak.

My son could not enjoy life as others.

Days passed with desperate visits to doctors. A whole month, my husband was at the hospital beside him and with several blood transfusions. He was getting weaker and weaker. I was so afraid I am going to lose my son.

I cannot believe why I was not gone insane.

He was passing the most important period of a youngster's life – he was in his twenties. His higher studies, his future, his recognition as a winner or failure in life, all decided during that period.

That was why my friend gave that assessment to my son – as a failure.

I wanted to tell her that the best I received from my son was the day he was able to attend a wedding. The day he went out without hesitation, the day he happily played his computer game without having to stop it every thirty minutes.

The best of one’s life may not be the best of some other.

Same way, your precious chattel may not be the best in another’s life. Some may value freedom rather than monotonous office life. Some may prefer to live in an extended family home rather than building a nuclear family. Your life could be different in so many ways than mine.

Before assessing the achievements of one's life, try to tread the path they walked. Never criticize a child with his/her parents. A child itself is a jewel in their crown, not a burden.

This life story is a tribute to all the parents who fight for a normal life for their child!



1 : Your failure may not be the same for me

2 : Do not evaluate others on your perceptions

Category:  Failure / Subcategory:  Failure may not be the same

Tags: failure, assessments, perceptual differences, winning life, views of life

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Amara Kone


This is what makes people obnoxious. They say hurtful things without considering the feelings of other people. You are right Amelia, unless you tread the path someone walks, you should never criticize them. How dare her criticize your son. I hope your son is doing better. I am also sending love to all of you.

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Bruce Peters


Amelia--I am not sure what to say, I am only thinking about my son. Always the first thought when you hear of another child being sick. I cannot imagine what you and your husband must be dealing with. You always seem to be of strong character, and I hope that helps you deal with his illness. I send my love to all of you.

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Lisa Steffler


Oh, Amelia, I can only imagine the pain you are feeling. Mothers are only happy when their children are happy. This must be such a heavy burden on your heart. If I could, I would take away some of your pain. Just remember that God loves you and your entire family. Keep hope and faith in your heart, Amelia.

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Adaego M. Azi


Amelia--I tried not to, but I started crying after reading your duppydom. I am so sorry to hear about this. That woman is horrible, you should never talk to her again--she is not your friend. I hope your son is doing okay. I hope you are doing okay. I will pray for the two of you.