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Amara Kone

 

What True Friendship Should Look Like

Posted On:08-Feb-2020/10:13 am

Friends are very important in our lives, because without them we might end up as lonely and sad people. With friends, we have shoulders to cry on, people to share secrets with, and souls with whom we can share happy moments. Friendship is so beautiful that with time, we begin to see our close friends as family. Friends stay with us through thick and thin; they’re are always there during our best and happy moments.

However, friendship can be different from what was described above; there are fake friends and true friends as well. Fake friends are people who claim to be your friends but rarely have your interest at heart. These people only show up when things are rosy but are rarely available when you truly need them in your life. Nowadays, most people are skeptical when it comes to friendship, because it’s becoming difficult to identify who true friends are. Now the question is, how do you recognize true friendship?

As a 29-year-old, I’ve already had a ton of friends – both good and bad – in my life. With all these experiences, I’ve figured out 3 things that are similar to every true friendship. Let’s see what true friendship should look like:

1) There Is No Selfishness

It is a natural human instinct to be selfish; we always tend to put ourselves first before anyone else. However, true friendship should be selfless, it shouldn’t be about receiving alone but sharing as well. I’ve observed that most people can comfortably list out a thousand things they expect from their friends, but when the tables are turned, they find it difficult to do those same things for their friends. This is totally wrong. True friendship should be all about sharing equally.

2) Does Not Seek Perfection

Perfection is an illusion which cannot be achieved by humans because each and everyone of us are filled with unique flaws. We are imperfect and this can be noticed in almost everything we do, even in our friendships. However, some people expect their friends to be perfect. They get angry at any slight mistake and even go as far as comparing their friends to other people. That’s not how true friendship should be. The irony is that most people who expect their friends to be perfect, are full of flaws as well. Therefore, in order to create true friendship, you need to understand that we humans are full of flaw. When you understand this, you’ll be able to look above their little mistakes and love them even more.

3) True Friendship Lasts

Nothing can be compared to friendship that lasts a lifetime! True friendship stands the test of time because it is borne out of affection, selflessness and understanding. Fair-weather friends will disappear when the going gets tough but true friends stick with you, no matter the situation. When two friends are willing to be available, selfless, and understanding with each other, then their friendship will last for a very long time.

Takeaways:

1 : There are true friends and fake friends. Watch out for fake friends.

2 : Fair-weather friends (fake) are only out to get something from you. They never reciprocate.

3 : True friendship includes selflessness, acceptance of your imperfections and being in it for the long haul.

Category:  Relationships / Subcategory:  True Friends vs. Fake Friends

Tags: love, affection, understanding, flaws, happy moments, family, fake, selfish, sharing, perfection, lifetime, selfless, available

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Adaego M. Azi

11-Feb-2020

Amara, I think the first sign of a fake friend and a bad person in general, is someone who is selfish. Selfish people never reciprocate and only think about themselves--whether it’s a friend, a boyfriend or family member, this is someone you do not want or need in your life. SJakes, I don’t think fake friends think about you finding out that they are gossiping behind their back. This is just something they do--maybe this is just their idea of friendship. Thank you Amara :-)

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S. Jakes

11-Feb-2020

Amara and Bruce--you are so right. You always have to look out for fake friends. I seem to attract them. There is nothing worse than confiding in someone you thought was your good friend only to find out that she has been going behind your back for years. I do not understand why people do that. Don’t they know that eventually you will find out? Thanks Amara.

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Bruce Peters

09-Feb-2020

Amara, I like the idea of watching out for fake friends. The ones who only call you when they need something. I find the best way to deal with these people, is to decide that you will never be close to them and treat them exactly the same way they treat you. I also agree that true friends last forever. My best friends are the ones who are just as busy as me and we rarely see each other (sometimes once a year), but when we see each other, it's like no time has past.