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Amara Kone


Why You Must Avoid The Pain Of Regret

Posted On:13-Jan-2020/5:54 pm

Every single day of our lives, we are faced with choices - both good and bad - and the decisions we make in each of these moments go a long way in either destroying or shaping our future. Most of the time, we choose to do the right thing and we make the best decisions. However, there are times when we make wrong choices, not because we want to do the wrong thing, but because we think we we’re doing what’s best for us. After making a bad decision, we usually don’t realize what we have done until we begin to see the consequences of our actions. These consequences come with some emotional pain; a type of pain called regret.

A lot of people suffer from regret, they keep wishing that they could go back to the past and do things differently. In fact, they think that by looking back at their past with dissatisfaction, they may find some liberation from their mistakes. However, that’s usually not the case. Over the years, I’ve made so many wrong decisions in my life and I've also experienced the pain of regret. With all these experiences, life has taught me that regret does not solve anything and the only way to move forward is to avoid the pain of regret.

Here are three reasons why you must avoid the pain of regret:

1. Mistakes Are Inevitable

No human being is perfect; we all make mistakes. This means that mistakes are bound to happen, whether we like it or not. Although it is wrong to deliberately make wrong choices but even when we make mistakes, we can always learn from them. Therefore, when you make a bad decision, instead of regretting and wishing you could change it, you need to pick valuable lessons from that mistake and move on with your life. Trust me, the lessons you learn from your bad decisions will help you make better decisions in the future and also save you the time of regretting.

2. Regret Does Not Change Anything

The popular cliché “crying over spilt milk” is a true representation of the word regret. Worrying and stressing about a bad decision you made in the past will not change anything, rather you’ll end up physically, emotionally and mentally tired. Regret will make you wish you could turn back the hands of time, but wishes are not horses and you can’t really change anything in the past.  Therefore, instead of wishing and trying to change things that happened in the past, you can choose to react positively and move on with your present life.

3. Regret Will Keep You Stagnant

Some people find it difficult to move forward in life, simply because they just can’t let go of the past. Regret does not bring progress, because it’s almost impossible to move forward when you’re constantly thinking about going backwards. It just keeps you stagnant. The decisions you’ve made in the past may be greatly influencing your life today, however, the future is a blank slate and your decisions today can make a difference in your future.

So, instead of regretting and trying to change things that have happened in the past, you can prepare for the future by making the right decisions today. That’s the only way to move forward.


1 : We are not perfect beings. Having regret is a part of life.

2 : We cannot change the past so stop dwelling on previous mistakes.

3 : The best course of action is to learn from these past decisions and move forward.

Category:  Emotions / Subcategory:  Regret

Tags: choices, decisions, emotional pain, mistakes, dissatisfaction, progress, forward, past, future, backward, wishing, change, stagnant

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Amara Kone


Kedu! Adaego. It looks like we are countrywomen.

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Adaego M. Azi


Amara--welcome to duppydom--I don’t think I have seen you here before (which country in Africa are you originally from?). Over the years, I have also made many many wrong decisions. And I have also learned that the best course of action is to learn from them and move on. One main thing I have learned is that living my life for my parents (or other relatives) is always a point of regret. I cannot listen to what people tell me is best for me.

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Bruce Peters


Amara, firstly, I like your style of writing--very sequential and very logical. I like the comment that regret does not bring progress--this also congers up my divorce. For the longest time after my divorce, I regretted many things that happened in my marriage and I also regretted the idea of being divorced. I was very reluctant to tell people that I was divorced. Now that I have moved on, it seems silly that I used to think this way.

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S. Jakes


Amara, I think all of us suffer from regret. If you did not, then you would have to be a perfect human being. And since we are not perfect, not being stuck on past mistakes and learning from mistakes is the best bet. That being said, it can be hard to move on. Not being stagnant has to become a mindset.

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Amie Warwick


Amara, I enjoyed reading your duppydom. I can say for sure that regret does not change anything. Like you said, you cannot turn back the hands of time, nor can you keep believing that fate will make things better. You have to make the change yourself and keep moving forward. I really like the way you think Amara what an interesting name.